My training log and thoughts

30.07.2025 Lower body warmup upstairs, some upper body stretching down in the gym (the garage) Squat 20 and 70 100 - 120 - 140 153 - 163 - 173 - 183 - 193 - 203 for 3 Feels good! Nothing quite interesting. Been feeling good in general. Nutrition nice, only ate in the morning, slept at night, lovely sleep actually. Right now I have "normal" sleeping schedule. Had coffee. Enjoyed this mini-edit, put the song that was playing in my head even though I wasn't listening to it today at all. RPotD File:Decibel (ship, 1963) ENI 02315152, Koblenz pic4.JPG

 29.07.2025 Kinda nice day. Been fighting that strange sleepiness. Hot and humid again. Nutrition above okay. Workout Warmup - some Bench 20 - 50 - 73 Making sure to hold it on straight arms. Forcing that angle that contradicts itself. 103 for 12 wide grip 123 for 8 very good, slightly narrower grip 133 for 3 sets of 8 - super nice, surprisingly good. I am in a good shape after all! Finger is okay, pussing up just a tiny bit. I  can even allow myself some unnecessary strictening of technique. And my lockout is working great - must be cause I've been doing those straight arm holds or so I figure. The air, it is here. I am having it. The air! I am breathing well. 133 for 8 133 for 8 and a dropset - 103 for 10 and 70 for 12 - pretty hard! Feeling good. RPotD File:Colourful field - geograph.org.uk - 2453207.jpg

 27.06.2025 Yesterday I was super sleepy. Finger is better. Yesterday I fell asleep and decided it was good enough to postpone the session to today. Meanwhile I think a part of me had gotten super relaxed. Super soft, affected by weather and air pressure. My nostrils are clamping down automatically on DL right now. Had coffee, had another coffee while reading; ended up at a positive moment in book. Tried to write, but I have to say I'm not exactly there. Body and brain are so soft, soft like jelly. Been eating and sleeping well though. Workout Deadlift 20 70 for 15 123 - 163 203 for 4 - straps, finger exudes pus but otherwise holding up 240,5 for 4 - kinda hard, too soft, not generating effort 240,5 for 4 - a bit better 240,5 for 4 - about the same, lazy and soft, nostrils closing, so annoying to be like that lol. Wound recovery probably does something to your body to make you soft like that. And the weather isn't helping! But at least it's not super hot. 240,5 for 4 - both...

 21.07.2025 Warmup moderate, some wrist stretching, pushing against wall and floor. Bench press 20 - 50 - 100 120 for 5 - doing some straight arm holds before pressing. It's surprising how hard it is to keep arm fully straight. But it can be done and trained quickly. 130 for 5 sets of 5 - very nice and very easy, no pec pain or any other pain. I even started to achieve a peculiar and EFFICIENT wide grip technique. Only one accidental cramp later that night. That's why it's good to have workout that are a balance between strain (stimulation) and effort (CNS). Curls with 6 kg dumbbells, simulating preacher's curl - kinda nothing but it's nice I did something. Mental warfare. Winning, but it's a really hard fight. Please pray for me. 23.07.2025 I used to lose at mental warfare. Most of 2023 is a decline. Falling into pits, trying to crawl out. I wanna write a long 'misogynist' rant about how I've been abused by my mother when I was growing up and that...

 19.07.2025 Please pray for me. Deadlift 20 - 73 - 123 - 163 203 - a couple bad overhand reps, one semi-semi-okay rep, one mixed grip 233 for 2 not that easy 253 for 2 okay 263 for 2 not bad 273 for 2 decent - one mixed grip, one straps 273 for 2 hard - one middle belt, one high belt, took a pause in between 278 for 2 very hard, but no staggering! Smooth. 280,5 for 2 - first rep hard but smooth, I felt confident so I went for a quick second rep. No cigar! Didn't get enough air. A short break and I managed another one - really heavy, not smooth but very satisfying. The bar pretty much stuck on top of my kneecaps but I just knew I could lock it out - and I did! Slowly but surely. That's the problem though; if you don't do all sets quick, then you can't do a quick set all of a sudden. And it was heavy, and my CNS was struggling all day today. Thank you for your prayers. God is listening, I can tell. Still, at this point I have a lot of unresolved issues, including big ones...

 16.07.2025 Bench press 20 - 40 - 73 123 for 5 133 for 5 143 for 5 145,5 for 5 - too hard for my taste, I have to admit 148 for 4+2 - I was most likely able to do a proper 5, the 4th rep was fast but hard. I racked it, sat up and waited for a short while; then I laid back and did 2 more - one extra to compensate I guess; it was very easy and the break was probably not more than 30 seconds. But of course it's subjective. This superstitious failure turned out to be a bit of a blessing in disguise as I turned my subsequent unracking into a dropset - 123 for 8 pretty easy 73 for 15 also very easy. Strong pump! No joint or connective tissue problems today - something to celebrate! I wanted to do DL but changed my mind. I think it's a wise decision, cause Monday wasn't as easy as it seemed at first. I'll continue from here tomorrow - hopefully. God have mercy!

 14.07.2025 Nice day. Not sure about my physical state. I sort of slept relatively well the last two days. Ate decent - but over twelve hours ago by now. Carbs and protein, a lot of them. The weather isn't quite as oppressive but still I'm sweating a lot, high humidity. I need peace when I try to read. I'd usually go to the kitchen and read there in one of the comfortable chairs. But I get really bothered when I can't read cause someone is demanding my attention. I don't wanna be a rager though, not anymore. My soul is a lot more solid. I moved to the porch. There's a bunch of old sofas there. They're gonna rot in Fall. Not good. They're already rotting. How to deal with this? Anyway, I sat down and read quite a few interesting as well as confusing parts of House of Leaves. There's a bunch of little semi-obvious quirks and nods in it, as well as a great amount of invisible things. Very curious. I really recognize a lot of my own thinking in it, the t...

 11.07.2025 So hot and humid. Feeling okay. Nutrition medium. Workout Some warmup - mostly dynamic presses, bouncing my body against the bar Overhead press 20 - 50 - 70 - 90 100 - 5 sets of 6 - pretty difficult, but the barbell moved very well, especially when I entered the groove. Squat Warmup - hip stretches, trying to achieve the same right feeling as yesterday 50 - 100 150 for 3 - hip hurts. Don't like it. Gotta warm up more. I may wanna take it easier in the following period of training. But my legs 100% need loading. Hmm. I have a couple ideas. First, more warmup though. 153 for 5 - so much better. I didn't do any extra warmup. Things I changed: 1) Unracked the bar a few times until it was even 2) Narrower grip - index fingers on outer markings; left forearm pronator still cramping from it 3) Went slower, especially at the start. Accelerated out of the hole - but *that* is supposed to be given, I wouldn't say I tried it now, although I don't typically focus on spe...

11.07.2025 Please keep praying for me. I'm losing my mind over here. And it's way too hot. The plan was to do some light-ish OHPs yesterday. It's changing. A light session today. Workout Squat-pullups on rings - I decided it's more a fitting name than "floor supported ring pullups". 10 - 20 - 30 - 20 - 20 Forearms burning, arms and lats pumped; I look grotesque in window reflections. Curls 6+6 kg dumbbells - 2 sets of 25 37 kg ez bar - 2 sets of 15 - technique tight, using body. Been watching a lot of random Lee Haney shorts and inspired to do some of this again. Some lat/forearm stretches - just gripping the pullup bar with a supine arm and some very gentle pulling of the body. Feels good, not painful. I believe my right forearm supination has improved from Springtime when I trained it a lot. Squat 5 set of oldschool stretches/static holds a-la horseman stance - I seemingly forgot about them and was doing something more laid back. This heat is a perfect time ...

 09.07.2025 Finally came back to write. Finalized some of my vision. Brain was buzzing well. Enjoyed reading. Horrible humidity, really sweating, sticky. So lucky it wasn't the case on Monday! Also please just keep praying for me and my stuff. I'm nervous but God helps me. Workout Warmup - some, gentle stretches and static holds Bench press 20 - 70 - 100 120 for 5 140 for 3 150 for 3 not as light as I wish it was 153 for 3 hard but no cheating yet 153 for 3 a little better, got some music going 155 for 3 - done as 2+1; a technical mishap - I placed myself too high in relation to the barbell and couldn't press vertically. But I changed the position and fixed it. Some cheating occured, although I probably didn't need it. I need to gather myself a do a good set. 155 for 3 - very bad, changed technique somewhat impulsively on third rep. I have to always have my elbows supporting the bar, you know? I changed that on the third rep. It was hard. And it is very hot. But if you ...

 07.07.2025 - technically 8th Nice day. Ate very well. Not stimulated, not liking this. Brain was not buzzing for the longest time. Blame yesterday. Workout Deadlift 20 - 73 - 123 - 163 - 203 233 for 2 263 - 2 sets of 2 super easy 273 for 2 not bad, smooth - barely putting in effort... I worked up to this set way too quickly! Must be the carbs I consumed helping me. The soup, I made a second soup similar to the one I made last week. 273 for 2 - a little easier than the previous one. The first recording in many months now... Decided it was worth it. 273 for 2 - nice, putting in effort - hard but smooth, quick reps. Listening to Barbarity - The Wish To Bleed. It fucking rocks! 🤘🤪 On the titular song. There's this part where just the bass plays. So cool! 293 for 1 - PR+10 kgs 😀😀😀 Lovely. Enjoying Bent over row 100 for 20 - had to take a pause in the middle because my hip extenders were cramping Back to grooving in the tunnel, playing FO76 - I've been playing a tank build a lo...

 05.07.2025 Thinking, planning. I am sort of building up for a bing bench workout. Bench is sort of in second place, after DL. Not actually pushpress. It's reasonable - my bench has been in a hole longer than my PP. Phrasing, lol. Not intentional! Ten years of having a 140 kg pushpress. Not bad? I wouldn't say that. MORE than ten years of having really poor bench. At least in PP I reached a round number! In bench I was weak. But my modus operandi requires OHP, it does - and it's good. However, today's workout is a question. How and what for am I working? For the heavy bench workout ahead. I think I will do some kind of pressing on Monday - that's where I decided to place my next DL workout. It should be very good - I hope. And given all that energy pumping, Wednesday bench workout should be very good - if nothing goes wrong after the DL workout. I'm afraid of PRs sometimes. PRs deflate you, make you lift light after you achieve them. But I need them. I will chas...

 04.07.2025 Nice day. Sleep moderate, nutrition slightly above average. Riding a wave of stimulation. Have internet issues with one of my students, it drives me insane, angry. Had some coffees - one cup of instant, one pot of 30/330 conventional while reading House of Leaves downstairs - it's really picking up! - and another cup of instant coffee. Workout Light one for today Lat pulls, to chest 5 spring expander - 7 sets of 30, using rope as a handle, rotating forearms Pullups - chinups 2 set of 15 + 5 - not really strict, pretty hard! Second set was even harder, but I was reminded of apes on those last reps. Curls - couple very light sets, cause I was feeling like it, one with 2 kg dbs, another with 6es. Rear delt flys - done a-la one handed bent over supported swings 😁 Actually a fun exercise. 6 kg dumbbell - 3 sets of 20 each arm. Delts burn all the while the rest of the back pumps in a lovely manner. It's a pretty epic exercise, a lot of fun. Making me feel like some ancie...

 03.07.2025 Nice day. Energy moderate. Please keep praying for me. Last night I made some real crazy soup. I thought we had no meat, but all the bones and random stuff my mom was saving in the freezer - apparently there's a lot of meat on those! And I also dumped a whole frozen chicken inside. Boiled it for over an hour while playing FO76. It's good, white, thick, brains and fat and chicken skin. Made my usual, a whole lot of caramelized onions, carrots, potatoes in larger chunks. It turned out great, really spicy. Later I took out the bones and scraped all the meat off of them, even though they were really hot. That soup is lifeblood, a great lot of amino acids, very little - but some, I admit - vegetable oil (during onion and carrot caramelizing). I've had it. Meanwhile, in FO76 it's the Meat Week, the grill week celebration, that makes me appreciate flesh even more. All the smaller bits, the brains, the organs, the connective tissues - if I was younger I wouldn't...

 02.07.2025 Please continue praying for me. I'm close to resolving my issues but the 'clerical office' was either not working or missed my message. Will have to write them again - last communication was a week ago... It was hard, mentally, to work out in April. I wanted to drop it all and go away for the Summer. If the issue had been resolved by then I'd have done it. Now I'm hip deep in this new DL program, heh. And a new way to write. Soul changing, growing. Muscle of the spirit. Not easy! There are a lot of failures, and bad ones. But God is merciful. Our Father! When all are gone He is here. Today I'd like to do some OHP. Just some. So I can have perfect energy and power for my upcoming Bench press session. It's sort of supposed to mirror my DL training, but I gotta admit it's mostly intuitive microcycling - from lower weight high volume to heavy weight even higher volume. It's funny, but I feel like the number one definition for "volume...

 31.06.2025 Some shoulder flys, one arm press focusing on obliques - all light, up to 16 kg kettlebell. 01.07.2025 So, it's Tuesday. An unusual day for DL! Feeling decent. Slept well, ate okay. Deadlift 20 - 70 123 for 5 - got a lubed up bar, it's all slipping, gotta wear collars 163 for 5 203 for 4 (done as 2+2 admittedly) - first rep semi-decent overhand, then mixed grip. The fact that I could do the overhand rep is extra nice because my skin was warm and soft and wet at that moment. But I figured if you flex the muscle hard enough the texture shouldn't matter as much. This is not axle or a pinch grip after all! 233 for 4 - done easy enough, I have that good groove today, but not really warmed up yet on this one 253 for 4 not great, not bad. This feels like the last "warmup" set, which might be a good indication. Hmm. 255,5 for 4 a little better, forcing my CNS to work 255,5 for 4 good, better than previous ones. We are heading somewhere! This is some oldschool ...