My training log and thoughts

 24.11.2021 Well, let's get to it. After monday I fell ill - more ill than I've been in a long time. Last week I tore up my throat by having wasabi peanuts. On monday things went even worse - overtraining, came outside with no coat, and then this heavy bag work in my room - filled up my throat with dust, got sweaty and opened the window. And I've been having way too much coffee. This is serious. I easily become uninhibited under coffee. Clumsy, stupid, impulsive. It's time to make a change once again. 29.11.2021 Well, it has been a crazy week. I repent in being stupid and vicious to myself. Eating too much wasabi peanuts (caused by caffeinated/endorphined (post training) stupidity), generally overtraining since 13th, hosting negative thoughts, doing heavy bag work in my room - breathing in sawdust and then flushing myself with cold november air. And after that, spending more than three hours doing dubious things on the internet, possibly delivering a killing blow to my ...

 22.11.2021 Nice day. Slept all day yesterday - on free time, of course! I'd be ashamed if I cancelled my repeatable quests to sleep. Sometimes it does happen. I need to figure out a way to avoid it. Woke up at 1AM. Surfed the web. Watched a cool movie - Ex Machina (2014). It's a kinda movie that makes ask question - and then you're the one who has to answer them. A lot of those questions are obvious, but some are not. Had nice thick coffee. You always gotta rest between coffee days. The one today tasted great. Cause I didn't have any yesterday. You gotta let your brain rest. That's how all pleasures work. Well, healthy pleeasures - actual addiciton will enslave you to do stuff until you're dead. Even alcohol kills some weak-willed people. It's a powerful depressant, you now. Ask yourself - do you really wanna be depressed? Cause you will be, if you do alcohol. Enjoyed my coffee, surfed the web some more in the evening. Not feeling very productiove video-wis...

 20.11.2021 Today feels a bit more orderful. Slept from 2 to 7, did some stuff, slept again for like three hours. Finally returned the bashed up guitar. Played it through the amp yesterday - it kinda sounds bad. Do I even need one of those pickups, since they're just overglorified mics? They look kinda ugly too. Maybe I should buy that special unique Epiphone that's both electroacoustic and semihollow. Too expensive though. I should probably just stick to cheaper gear, cause why do I even need expensive stuff? My lil SG Vintage edition is great and simple, black wood body, simply slick and natural looking. It's not the cheapest of them all, but it's one of the cheaper Epiphones. Not gonna lie, I don't wanna give my money to Gibson though. Just don't. Actually, it's not even Epiphone, it's Cort. This one - Cort CJ Retro VSM I'm moving my sessions around, so monday I'm gonna press again. Too often? Well, not this time. If I had three heavy sessions...

 19.11.2021 Strange day. As expected, after more than two weeks of excellent gym work I'm starting to drift off sideways. Wednesday workout turned out to be rather fatiguing in many ways - a lot of small unexpected spots are hurting, and wrist does too. I added one more activity to damage my wrist, oh my. (That being heavy bag practice). Well, not a big deal. Shouldn't be too problematic if I really pace myself well. Slept all day yesterday (that being all free time). Woke up late, then quite randomly fell asleep early into total dead sleep. Second time I've experienced that "dead sleep" lately. I'm going thtough something that I can describe as a light "ego death" - I feel like I've lost some connection in my mind between some things I do and what they used to mean. But it's rather light. I just gotta shed some old misconceptions as my mind and body suffers from a bit of overtraining. It's mostly in CNS. I didn't train yesterday, on ...

 17.11.2021 Nice day. Been feelin extra laid back, extra easy, not stressin, not carin. Not about a thing! Well, that's not completely try, but I don't really care. I just gotta be truthful enough. Got a big boxing bag delivered today. Spurged on it on saturday, felt all warrior-like and such. It turned out very cheap, but the delivery was expensive. Been feelin a lil too laid back, so CNS wasn't too amped at all. It was like 55/100 amped, meanwhile on monday it was close to 70%. And last saturday it probably was even higher. Overhead press Warmup 90*4 100*4 105*4 107,8 - 2 sets of 4 - not perfectly strict, but it got better. It's mostly CNS fatigue. Hands became more even, as I started leaning to the left and hand to fix my grip back, so it's even (not putting my left hand further away from the center). Held 50 kgs for a couple sets on my chest - stretching for proper pushpress. Did some heavy bag work - only jabs and straights, and some lower uppercuts. It's a...

 15.11.2021 Nice day. Woke up very early. Then fell asleep again. Decent breakfast. Got ampted after receiving a snarky comment on one of my videos. It's a lazily made video, I admit. I made a new one, and a really nice one, for that matter. Deadlift Warmup 170*5 overhand 190*4 - overhand, PR+1 rep 210*6 - 3 hook, 3 mixed 210*6 210*7 miscounted 210*6 That's it. Took me a while as I was trying to record a voiceover and kept failing at it. Ended up writing a script and following it. It might be a nice idea to have a plan first, and then you can write script/directions for yourself as you're recording. Worked for me today. Not perfect, but nice, I believe. Did I tell you I received my new guitar yesterday? Yes, I got it and was intensely disappointed. Basically, the guitar originally didn't have a pickup, and they installed it the really screwed up the guitar cover. And also it was dropped on it's butt and has a dent. I wrote a review telling people about this on the s...

 13.11.2021 I've been resetting my sleep schedule and it's rather uncomfortable. I feel like I'm low on creative powers, and I have this strong urge to create, but I feel like I'm not that great at the moment, due to lowered brain energy (because of the lack of sleep). I haven't been able to sleep at night peacefully, but during the day - oh my, such sweet calm dreaming. Well, I've been sleeping at night for a few hours, spending the morning nervously, and then waking up during the day somewhat drowsy. Today and yesterday, that's when it's been happening. I made a "not very good" video yesterday. There's way too many issues with this. It's an attempt at humor through deceit, and that creates an uncomfortable aftertaste. I sort of tried to copy the concept of being "exposed", like during the 4chan drama. That was fun times, but they're far gone. It's time to be creative in a meaningful, life-asserting way. "Life-as...

 11.11.2021 Ten years ago I walked into a shop and bought a Skyrim DVD. Didn't play it right away - it required an internet connection to update and such. I should've agreed to get a new laptop abck then. Oh, memories. I wanna visit that place again. Maybe buy a music album. Today - had strange sleep, woke up at 4PM after not very many hours of sleep at all. Had a plentiful breakfast - pork and buckwheat, quite staple and nutritious for simple strength gains. I should always have some food prepared in advance, oh silly me. Sometimes I really need my time. Had coffee. Started recording a new video. AID is out - technical problems. Stopped recording. Well, I started it, so that's great. I think I should concentrate on getting my sleep schedule back. I'd love to start working out around 3PM. Maybe that's what I should do on saturday. Except I'll only be free around 5PM. Well, knowing one of the quest givers I'm likely to be one hour early. Hope not, though. The...

 10.11.2021 Nice day. Sleep schedule = still broken. I gotta not lie in bed when I'm not sleeping, I reckon. Too bad the internet connection on my PC is lame atm. Getting broken up all the time. I suspect there might an app sucking my traffic or something. Like a Windows updater. So Task Manager is covering it and not letting me know it's sucking internet. Nutrition today = 7/10, very nice. Had a lot of spaghetti with sauce and meat long before the session. Right before the session I had some juice and coffee. Felt good. I wanted to make a video, but connection was bad. I thought of making a music-oriented video - which wouldn't require connection - and came to conclude that it might end up being too loud too late today. Pray for me, for my discipline! I gotta get stuff going. I will. I already am. Overhead press - the plan was 72,5% for 4 sets of 6. I curbed it just a little bit to ensure energy for other exercises. Warmup to 70*6 90*6 95*6 97,8*7 - miscounted, decided to ...

 08.11.2021 Nice day. Things are in order, more or less. Nothing too bad is happening. Made a meme video - Deadlift Warmup up to 190 230*2 240*2 245*2 245*2 247,8*2 - difficulty 6/10, cause I amped myself just right and made this life powerful 247,8*2 harder, but nice Straight up uploaded a vid of my DLs as well Unloaded the barbell. Nutrition is decent today, 65/100, keeping it somewhat disciplined. Sleep - not sure, slept way too much yesterday and stayed up all fewerish until the morning, then I fell asleep. Well, I ain't skipping my work and such, so that's okay I hope. Figured out how to play that sequence from the last post jazz-style, or something like that. Maybe I should try transcribing it, just for fun. Warning: might be loud. Also I added drums and bass. Wanted to do some more exercising, but it is quite late. Perhaps I'll stick to super light stuff. What else? A pandom pic of the day, perhaps. Not really random, hehe.

 06.11.2021 I've been such an unpleasant person recently - or that's how it feels, at least. Sort of unnecessarily strained. The №1 reason I wanna buy a telecaster is cause it's more unique for metal. Been busy today. Managed to wake up earlier. Must not do things long past midnight. I screwed it all up massively cause I spent so much time editing a video on monday night/tuesday morning. But, thankfully, my training has been rather great. I decided to buy a vertical mouse, and it arrived today. Feels very awkward so far, and it requires small batteries, and I don't have rechargeable small batteries. I hope it can help my wrist. After some time - it feels less awkward. It's already 6PM. Is it late? Today we're not having any heavy sessions - just squat and bench, I hope. If I did my OHP's on wednesday I could've considered making today another OHP day. When I think about it - I wanna do pushpress. I just have to. Just like last week. Maybe nothing heavy. ...

 04.11.2021 Very nice day. Started out dreadfully, as I tried to fall asleep earlier. I decided to use a stupid method, given to us by our ancestors, to fall asleep. Just drank some tea with honey. The bitter taste awakened disgusting memories of being "medicated" with honey when I was a kid. Honey can be nice - when your body is hungry. Had some fewerish sleep for a couple hours, was nervous and anxious for reasons I'm not gonna mention (I did something slightly out of the ordinary). Well, i can admit it - I turned off my phone and that must have made me anxious. There's so much damned negativity in my old noggin. In my conscious. Do not like. If I didn't pay attention to Christian morals I'd probably be an even worse person to be around. I know I was quite "rough around the edges" in the past, and I didn't even notice it in the moment. Who to blame? I was such a gentle little fruity flower until I turned 15. Whiny, pesky, annoying. Well, a chil...

 02.11.2021 Nice say so far. Slept all day long - somehow that felt wrong, seeing how I had things to do in my free time. Well, that's the price you have to pay for combining different kinds of work and fun in one day - and also going too far. I could've stopped editing some time after midnight, but I wanted to do more. Did some repeatable quests after I woke up (i.e. worked). You know, it's strange - I plyaed ESO for ten minutes to get some footage for the video, enjoyed the aesthetics of level designs and music and somehting clicked in my brain and started to release a massive rush of pleasure. I feel like a kid again! I'm so excited to be on the internet and to watch and read absolutely anything. Yes, when i was young I did have undying curiosity towards almost anything. It's strange, isn't it? I almost dizzy from it. Well all experience moments like this in our life, but we don't often acknowledge them and record them. How unusual. The light, it's li...

 01.11.2021 Really nice day. Woke up rather late, did some work, had buckwheat and eggs for breakfast, had some coffee (one batch), and then I started trecording a new video. You'll see it soon, hopefully - this one's gonna take more than one day. Is it promising? Well, yes, in a way. Did quite some erratic work recording the voiceover as well as my silly old mug, trying to be at least somewhat more expressive - it wasn't too hard since coffee was indeed getting to me. Around 7 I finally got to my workout. Deadlift Warmup 230*3 240 - 4 sets of 3 - very nice! All reps were rather easy. Rate of percieved exertion? No idea. Around 7, I guess. And I'm not completely on board with this RPE thing - I don't know enough about it. But I guess it's a somewhat nice way to mark how hard the sets were. Fixed the leaking toilet by wiping down the flushing mechanism and screwing it in tightly - that felt good. Cooked some nutritional paste to feed junior acolytes of the Order....