A wake up call

 24.11.2021

Well, let's get to it. After monday I fell ill - more ill than I've been in a long time. Last week I tore up my throat by having wasabi peanuts. On monday things went even worse - overtraining, came outside with no coat, and then this heavy bag work in my room - filled up my throat with dust, got sweaty and opened the window.

And I've been having way too much coffee. This is serious. I easily become uninhibited under coffee. Clumsy, stupid, impulsive. It's time to make a change once again.

29.11.2021

Well, it has been a crazy week. I repent in being stupid and vicious to myself. Eating too much wasabi peanuts (caused by caffeinated/endorphined (post training) stupidity), generally overtraining since 13th, hosting negative thoughts, doing heavy bag work in my room - breathing in sawdust and then flushing myself with cold november air. And after that, spending more than three hours doing dubious things on the internet, possibly delivering a killing blow to my health.

I was a bit delirious on early tuesday, just informed my mom that I'm sick, didn't ask for much, spend most of the day sleeping fewerishly, getting worse, not eating. Wednesday - better, I think my mom got much more involved that day and we called a doctor who happens to be both a homeopath and normal ear doctor, I was hoping he was gonna prescribe some normal medicine, but I guess we should have been more explicit. My poor mother believes in homeopathy so much she thinks it's possible to overdose on that stuff. Oh well, I'm guilty of doing this medicine "just for the heck of it", thinking that maybe the placebo effect will work even when I know of it. Maybe it did. The nasal spray sure helped me keep my nose wet and washed. I identified the illness as what we in Russia call angina, or tonsillitis.

My mouth region and tonsils had moving pains all over them, I kept generating loogies from my throat and had to either keep em in my mouth, spit them out or swallow. I didn't know that you can wash out most of this stuff with ketoprofene. Oh, if only I knew sooner! Ha ha.

My mom forced me to take a bath despite my high temperature, and I complied. It wasn't too bad in the end, I didn't boil myself. I think I simply must start showering/bathing more often. It's gonna help me relax my CNS.

Don't remember much about thursday - must have been another day when I expereinced extreme weakness most of the day. Yes, almost all the time it's been extreme weakness, burning head, barely able to swallow or keep anything in my mouth, and completely erratic fewerish state. Simply couldn't have normal sleep - I kept running between different rooms, trying to find a place that felt comfortable. In the end, sitting in the chair by the heater on the kitchen turned out to the most soothing. Weird. My room felt way too cold all the time.

Ordered baby food, was able to eat some - that was nice. The kids inevitably ended up muching on a lot of it, but that's okay.

On friday mother suggested gurgling baking soda, and I tried reluctantly. Why reluctantly? Maybe we'll discuss that later. It relieved some of my constant mouth and throat pain. Later that day I tried ketoprofene and I think I was finally able to relax for the first time ever. So I read wikipedia articles on treatment of these illnesses and concluded that I also need antibiotics. Asked my mom to bring them to me. She did, and I took some, and that when the symptoms finally started going away. It was friday, I think. It became so much easier. Later temperature went away, mouth pain disappeared and throat pain was minimized. It was great.

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And all of this stuff was a life changing event, just like the 20th of may 2020. I got ill due to a combination of factors, most of them having one root cause: ininhibited stupidity. Ininhibited by what? Natural hormones from training too hard and caffeine. Vile old caffeine. Once again, I knew I started going overboard. My training has been going nuts too. I thought to myself: since I choose to work as little as possible for as much money per hour as possible (loose definition), why don't I try the same for my workouts? This should really work well for my physical culture. Cause november has been very fruitful training-wise - a lot of nice succesfull workouts, all inevatiably leading to overtraining, uninhibition and then a massive illness. Then, it is settled - I shall work out as little as possible for as much profit as possible! Screw all the unnecessary pleasures. I shall have pleasure from having extra energy, as well as a much clearer mind.

Coffee... still a bad drug. I dread developing toelrance to it, cause when you're tolerating to it you ineviably end up drinking so much it makes you ill, gives you some kind of syndrome that ruins your normal everyday function. In the summer of 2020 it was alright. It was almost always limited. Please, pray for me. I'm not planning to stop taking it, but I hope to limit it into absolute maximum misery.

Today was a nice day. In the last three days I've been experiencing the most heavenly relaxing sleep in a very long time, after the initial phase of not getting normal sleep.

Today I decided it was time to do it. I broke my old convetions and had coffee in bed, because realistically - I don't need a PC for anything I do while having coffee.

This time it was the humble 60 beans over 1.5 small cups - tasting nicely enough, and I felt the effect. I'm so much more dsigusted with coffee now. I think I blame it for a lot of things that happened. including shitty sleep for such a long time. Heck. Let's see if I'm gonna have bad sleep tonight.

Deadlift - only sets of 5

50 easy enough

100 back feeling some unusual strain - it must have gotted really de-toned

150 not too hard, but harder than expected. I think that for a short while I was expecting to have the same energy as a week ago? Well, I didn't, 150 felt smooth and fast enough, but I had to stop.

100 okay

50 technique

Can't breathe in fully. Lungs or whatever are stuff filled with a lof of loogies, and I'm still taking antibiotics to make sure I feel nothing unusual in my throat, unlike now.

Floor supported ring pullups - minimum difficulty (max leg use)

4 sets of 10, long breaks

Bodyweight has only dropped by 2 or 3 kgs in the whole week of being ill and having and extremely moderate diet. That is suprising. My body shrunk visually a bit, of course. But I'm still surprised with how little BW I've lost.

Random picture of the day