January 09-10 - Very light day and DL for 4 sets of 6, partially resetting the program

 09.01.2024

Kind of a nice day. Didn't sleep at night, had a pill, went to work at school, but later, once I returned home I got news i wasn't being hired after all, after one month and one additional day of work. Oh well. I foresaw something along the lines of. Bureaucrats don't want fresh, living blood. Heh. Sounds like funny coping. No matter. It might be at least partial truth. Anyway, I prefer not to care. These news helped reset something in me, and even though I'm deeply disappointed, I no longer feel anxious and distressed somehow.

That day I slept a lot during the day - it was very deep sleep, since I've had such a long day by combinign Sunday and half of Monday. I had a micro workout -

L-flys and full range shoulder flys (superset) - 2 kg dbs for 3 sets of 15, nice pump for back and shoulders

Squat - 2 sets of 10 - something felt fragile in my knee. Not good news. My legs are indicating to me that they need some rest. I've been having sharp, but not very strong pains around my left hip and outer left thigh.

10.01.2024

Woke up sort of early. Disjointed a little. Calm. Had a nice breakfast - protein, some veggies with them. Some left, even. It's so early and bright for me. I'm pondering what exactly I should deadlift today.

***

Had one conventional brew. The arabica/robusta mix - 20 grams over roughly 240 grams of water. My preferred old proportions don't hold up, too strong apparently.

***

Now I'm having a third conventional brew. It's dark outside, I feel more apt. I don't feel like I have to go light today.

I'm thinking of going back to Week 7, Session 1 instead of restarting the whole program. Makes sense? We'll have to see far in advance. 4 sets of 6 with 72,5%. So, 220-230 kgs. Kinda light. If I can do things with improved discipline it'll be good.

My theorem on caffeine interacting with immediate mental stimulants seemign to be proving itself right. I was going through my usual distressing content that I've developed a habit of consuming and feeling wrong. And now I'm listening to some forgotten re-discovered music on my youtube music account. The albums I purchased in google music did not disappear after all, they were hiding in plain sight! But, alas, I think I cannot actually own this music - i.e. I can't download it back to my drives, even after paying money for it. What a sham.

The base of my index finger has been hurting since the last time I deadlifted 280. Well, maybe it's been hurting since last week, I'm not sure. I'm feeling kinda wary. I gotta stick to lighter weights. Hmm. Maybe not. Well, today is simpler.

Music is relieving. I must listen to anything more. Anything I like, that is.

Workout

Deadlift

20 - 70 - 120 - 160 for 6 - took long, conventionally distracted breaks. Something about my grip makes it feel weak. Well, it's still the warmup.

200 for 6 straps - being a bit more careful now

230 for 6 okay, not very well warmed up, but fairly casual, in a good way.

230 for 6 nice, a little better

230 for 6 - had to take a break after three reps cause of wet hands. That was not smart. Should have applied chalk at the start.

230 for 6 okay. I'm not in my best shape, but today's workout was okay. In fact, it was so okay I did not even end up warmed up by the end (you know what I mean by "warmup"). Maybe it's because I took too long. Hmm. I expected this. I knew I wasn't gonna be able to start my workout before it's dark. I have a small suspicion that my reasons aren't psychological, but more physical. It's got something to do with the blood pressure, temperature, air humidity and sunlight. I woke up kinda early, bopped around on caffeine, by the time it was nearly over I got to my training. Oh, by the way, I played guitar and bass today. I even recorded a super basic passage. It's nice to do something, or anything at all. Step by step back to a nice place, perhaps.