September 21st - Deadlift's going alright

 21.09.2022

Well, well, well. Perhaps I should have held on to my desire to go on an adventure. Because it's coming back in force. There are different ways to go about it. And now I will not only achieve glory if I go, but also lose respect - from myself, at least - if I don't. Brainwashed? Perhaps. Not quite likely. I was never really an element fitting into conventional civilian society. Sure, I'm able to play a role, be a 'gear' in a complex mechanism. Not very useful, but hey, at least I was rotating the right way, unlike some. And I'm given a choise, merely by fact of my masculinity, to become a bigger gear with sharper teeth, playing an important role in another mechanism, the adjacent one.

I have some issues with health. But overall, it's decent, adjustable. I had two episodes of tonillitis a year ago. By my age I should learn to not breathe cold air or nasty fumes. When I had a bronchitis in 2015 it was cause I breathed in a lot of cold air.

Will I survive? Who knows, don't care. Right now my spirits are up. Pray to God they don't fall. And yes, even if you're reading in the future you can pray for me now, for what is happening now. Pray to keep up my spirits and not let me fall. As a theologian I can tell you that prayers work through time.

I really, really want to finish my song before I have to go. Quite opportune since my throat isn't feeling wacky. I will go, I shall go.

Funny how in my mind - and, perhaps, in some parts of the English language - words "will" and "shall" have gained additional meanings. If you were to study the language purely from works of art you could end up with a similar conclusion.

But I don't have a chorus written yet. Lyrics for it, that is. And if I'm in such a hurry - it might be a good idea to just stick with KVLT drums. I did pay for them, after all, pumping up finnish economy with my dollars.

Let's be real, before I can permit myself to go I need to finish a few things. Definitely the song, reassemble the G310, an, uh, tell some people that I won't be back for a while? Surely there might be something else...

I just don't give a shit abot nothing else. It's time, it's gotta be time to do it. Before I depart I should consider fixing up my sleep and get at least some cardio. Which means tomorrow is going to be a possibly sleepy day. Let's hope I can force myself to get up on time.

7:30. Having my coffee.

9:30 Finished helping my brother with his homework. Today, coffee jumbled me really hard. I reckon I might leave an impression of a mentally ill person. But, you, it's not "mentally", or "ill". It's just caffeine affecting a sensitive brain.

Workout

Deadlift

20 - 50 - 100 - 150 for 8

190 for 5

210 for 5

210 for 5

215 for 5

217 for 5

220 for 5

Okay. Nice. Took a long time. Hung out with my brother. If I leave, what's gonna happen to him? Yet I feel like I must. It will be exciting. Reset my brain. And if I come back - life will be ever so sweet.

Don't wanna finish my workout just yet. I gotta do at least a tiny bit more. But, alas, it's already 1AM. That's why I have a thursday to work out on as well.

Literally me






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