August 3rd, Wednesday - Light session, finished recording something

 03.08.2022

Okay day. Yesterday I felt a little bored, but not really bored. I fatigued myself by staying up too late for no reason. All these funny videos I've been watching mad eme wanna reinstall GTA 5. I'm starting to remember why I uninstalled it. Easy to find in this blog, early spring 2021. I managed to install it in one night. Watched Better Call Saul. First season is a little cartoonish, as per usual, but a lot of fun. Wanted to record something, but it was too late. Today I woke up slightly earlier to do some work. Got upset at some small thing and that really took me out out balance. Cause that "small thing" dragger a lot bigger things behind it. Painful realisation of my reality. But honestly, better than so many other things that seem better but are actually rotten. Constant conflict. That's life!

The weather today has gone hot and humid again. Not pleasant if you're like me.

Had my first coffee. Gonna have another one. I wanna create music. Remember when I used to spend nights just palying random stuff in Musescore? That was my nightly occupation for quite a while. Learning, very slowly. A lot of fun. Musescore is so underrated. It's the app I've been waiting for for so long. Can't believe I got it as early as december 2018. Time flies! It's been a few years. So many things feel like they happened yesterday.

I think I'll be taking the drums to my room to record. August seems like a rather free month so far. I'd like to finish my PP succesfully. August of 2021 was a really stiff month. I was so frustrated that month. August 2020 was very different. I was hopeful and clear. Enough to feel nostalgia for it now.

Mosquitos are more active now. I've trained to semi-successfuly just catch em with my hand. Fun stuff.

---

Finished recording guitar. The final part turned out gnarly. Not good or bad, just gnarly, ha ha. Now to feel up the lyrics 💀💀💀

Passage Ritual

Honestly, you won't believe how satisfying it is right now. I did not expect to feel that. I've been yearning for that feeling unconsciously.

Might as well upload it. It's just a demo. And it will become a final product later. I'm not rerecording anything, I think. Unlikely. Keep it gnarly, I say. I can't be fucking bothered being a so called perfectionist. The only way to achieve quality is through quantity. In our case, quantity of songs.

Adding vocals on top of the guitar always changes the guitar. Might wanna try automation. So the guitars aren't as compressed after the vocals. Hmm.

Toay it's 4 sets of 6, from 110 to 117, and 87% for a single in the end. So 135 for a single, if all goes well. And it's 9:30. Pretty late. That's how it used to be a lot in the past.

It's very late. 21:43. Made my third coffee. But hey, at least the weather isn't awful.

Funny how despair is sort of... freeing, you know. When you're in despair it just doesn't fucking matter, this and that and whatever the fucking shit. I don't care. It doesn't fucking matter. The future doesn't fucking exist, quite literally.

I'm not in despair right now. Not consciously, at least. You could argue that whenever you "abstract" yourself it's a lot like despair.

Did I tell you how I almost got a full set of Unyielding +1 Intelligence armor in FO76? I only need one piece. Trying to craft it the easiest way possible. Seems not too likely so far, but I always believed statistics don't apply to me 😂 (joke)

22:48. Done some warmup.

Workout

Push press

20

60 and 90 for 6 - decided to quite while I have enough energy left. Overestimation of recovery.

Squat - never forget to do it on time :D

10 BW

60 and 90 for 10

140 for 10 - nice, 4-5 RPE I guess, technique okay.

That's it. Feels good enough. Maybe I'll do a tiny bit more of something.

---

Playted GTA5 for a couple minutes. It's a work of art, you know. It's just that definitely sends pretty confusing messages. The plot is a crime comedy/action. Honestly, a pretty normal plot for US creativity. Online game has some real issues. P2W and reeeally demanding the money. Fun to visit virtual worlds, you know. Perhaps if I wasn't playing games and satisfying that part of my brain I'd wanna "travel" too.

After playing for some time, I remembered. It's awfully tedious, most of the stuff you have to do to grind money and have more fun with ingame missions. That's why it's awful p2w. Well, I had some fun with the minigames and races, so that's enough for me.

Did some light dumbbell curls for three sets.

Random pic of the day - ancient structure in Armenia