Wendesday, 15th of June - Another mad rant, nice pushpress

 15.06.2022

Nice day. Almost didn't sleep at night. Woke up and worked some. Had breakfast. Couldn't go back to sleep for a long time. Woke up at 7 PM (enough with the jokes already!) past meridian nineteen hundreed 19:00 military time in the evening o'clock. It's a forced joke. It's funny enough to me.

Sleep was okay, 6/10. Breakfast was okay too, can't rate it. Had some porridge with extra protein powder. Finally, an easy way to consume it, ha ha.

Having coffee. Made me wanna poop with just the smell again. 32 grams over 294 grams of water. Today it tastes good. 5/7.

Had nice little musical adventures yesterday. Went to finish the SQUE PRS treatment. Ripped off the masking tape, cut and scratched the glue from wrong spots. Now there's a white glue spot in place of the two chips in the binding. Had to be very careful, managed to avoid damaging the fretboard. Cleaned it up a plenty and installed 13-57 Мозеръ strings. They somehow turned out to be much harder than Ernie Ball Mammoth. Despite not being as thick, they must have been made from harder steel. I feel like they can be easily tuned down to bass range. In fact, I played some of the string there as I was tuning it. Easily playable with light touch! That's how Conan does it. I tuned it to C Standard 😂 Super tight, but it feels so  nice to play. No fret buzzing whatsoever. High sustain. Great tone, especially clean. You can mask "thinness" of the tone with distortion, but thick tight strings are just so great. Pure metallic sound. Played it to my current song, played a tiny bit of jazz, played through miniamp (most of the time I play through computer plugins).

Got scared a little when nothing worked. Tried all guitars and concluded that my cable died. Replaced it with the one that came with SQOE, I think it's decent quiality.

Have been stopping myself from making useless purchases. Even melatonin and extra strings (since I ran out of extra strings). Just don't buy cheap strings, ever. Curious about these Мозеръ brand. I think I have their classical strings on the Yamaha. Wanna buy another classical. But shouldn't. So much money going away. Don't worry, I'm impulsive enough to buy soemthing when it'll make me happy (the buying, not the item 😂).

You have to have a different approach. People who have strong will know how to avoid temptation, rather than be forced to fight it all the time. If you're a virile man who doesn't want to jack off unnecessarily, for example, it's the best idea to avoid looking at pornigraphy if you don't wanna jack it. I remember when I was younger. The slightest things used to turn me on. Going in public was simply torturous, ha ha (overexaggerating). Too horny, i was. One more reason to not go in public. Just like Jesus son of Sirach recommended. It's not a canonical book, is it? It's like, half-canonical. Apparently I like read the Bible when I write this blog.

Speaking of this blog, today i'm doing 4 sets of 6 going from 100 to 115 (72%), and then 132 for a "clean single". Shouldn't take too much time. It's 19:48 o'clock military time past meridian P.M. in the evening (eleven minutes til eight). Gah, what a silly joke 😁

Also I wanna buy the moka pot (for coffee) and super light classical strings. Yamaha has overly high action after all these years. Unpolular opinion - you probably should just put truss rods in classicals. Or not. Maybe the one I'm in possession of is just cheap, student type.

I concluded that they're not selling a cheap bass balalaika, it's, in fact, the wrong pictures. They're selling a normal small one. I should rather save money and buy a 5 strong bass with humbuckers - to difversity my tone library. Might be nice, might not. I'd love to try putting thinner striongs on a bass one day. Pardon my typos. Cna't be bothered fixing errors.

I like Acid Mammoth, but they're just too popular, aren't they?

Definitely gonna finish the bass for the song. I know it sounds nice already. Adtually, might wanna rewrite some verses. I'm just off beat there, even if I do sound expressive.

Eight pee em... Gonna take a tiny bit more time. Tomorrow I'm only a little busy, Having an in-person lesson, which is rare. I definitely feel that it's easier to explain things in person. Funny.

Dreams, dreams... What do we dream about and why? Is flying in your dreams really correlated with your growth homone level? I reaqlise I'm flying in my dreams by holding my breath IRL. Reasonable, eh? Just inhale extra air to feel lighter. Well, it's fun. And even in my dreams I sort of know I'm intentionally inhaling extra air IRL. Sort of the opposite of sleep-apnea, ha ha. It'd be funny if anyone noticed it. But good men sleep alone, even when married. It's better for calm sleep.

Watched a random Jordan peterson video. he talkes about how being rejected from a relationship - I mean, not just a crush, but being dumped/divorced - is a lot like haroin withdrawal, according to some study. Believeable, I guess, considering how violent some people become. Filth. I wish not to subject myself to that. Drugs. Hormones. Losing control over yourself for the the sake of "mother nature".

But I somehow feel like it'd be good to have a child. Preferably a boy - easier to udnersatnd, And if he happens to ahve the same temperament as me I can avoid my father's mistakes. Not putting him down for lulz, explaining more stuff, and lsitening to explanations as well. But, of course, ahrsh treatment raises better men, arguably. Some can be screwed up, some can be "tempered" and develop a strong will. I developed some, not much. I developed a rather idealistic, ever so gullible view on life that I still have to fight when I realise how dark and filthy the nature of some things is. Business, for example. You must expect to be lied to and tricked when yoiu're enganing with a businessman. Statistically - it's likely to happen.

Filth, filth, filth... Dirt, death and decay. Sin, uncontrollable sin that I am subjected to in this dark world. Why? Oh, Why am I drawn to death and suffering?

Well, it's not always so negative. Abstain, abstain from evil. "Abstain" is simply a latin word that means "stand aside". Or "hold from". Abstinere. "Ere" means it's a verb in infinitive form (neutral form).

Get me another coffee, please. Gonna drink it and start my workout around 9. It's gonna take about a couple hours. It's not gonna be too late.

Old Tomb is better than Acid Mammoth.,, Out of things I happen to have in my collection. You can hear that hecking Acid Mammoth were going with some kind of pop formula rather than actually grooving.

I wish I could never care about a thing. Ugh! Hate. I hate those people. They're vile, people who have no control over themselves. Filth! Be desinfcted.

I know I have this outlook because of some suffereing I went through. Lost people, who no eyes or hands of their soul. I was lost once, long ago, not knowing where to go, not knowing what to do or not do. Not doing bad things is very important. I have people who don't try to have control over themselves. They're naturally evil. Give them a nice opportunity and they'll commit a crime. Just cause they can get away with it. No contorl, no mind. Probably just biochemistry issues. Kill. I want to kill them. Stomp down on them and end their miserable lives. Free the world of filth.

I know I am mistaken when I am like this. I wish to be with my Lord, yet I stuggle. A sinner, in pain, constant pulsing pain of the mind. It can feel much worse than physical pain sometimes. A good way to avoid it - is to commit to meaningful things.

When i'll see evil die I'll be happy and relieved. Until then - I am not. I am filth. Can't control myself well. That's why I must avoid looking in the direction of the road to the pathway of temptation. Stay multiple steps away from it. I wish not to fall and break, for I know I am quite a lot like humpty-dumpty. Easy to fall. Easy to give into my filthy animal side. Pain. Hate. Constant fucking pain. I should be thankful I'm not worse than I am.

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Well, I oughta get going. Start my warmup. I wonder how many pages this silly blog would take if it was put into a book format. Ten years ago printing your own book wouldn't be too expensive. These days it's probably a lot. You're better off doing it yourself. The blog, of course, isn't a book and shouldn't be a book. If I were to want to make a book I should write some rather specific proper memoirs. Not random baloney spilled on top of my training log.

Workout

Some gentle warmup for my shoulders and arms

Overhead press

20

60 for 6 - right roator cuff hurts. Thankfully, it's only the muscle, because it's strong enough to twist itself into a more proper position, but not warmed up to flexibility

90 for 6 okay

113 for 3 not bad. Didn't breathe quite right, so I decided to stop at 3 rather than try to go for 6. My last heavy workout was on saturday, after all.

Push press

60 for 6 and some quarter front squats before that

100 for 6

105 for 6 - It helps a lot to use a "cue losung", if you will. "Air, acceleration, power!" Really helps with breathing and nervous impulse.

110 for 6 - Nice, effective, had to rest for quite a while before I felt right though. I think I'm not completely ready for frequent heavy sessions. That means my next OHP isn't going to be saturday, but either monday or wednesday. I might wanna shove in some rare exercises too, it's warm outside after all.

115 for 6 nice

Managed to drum a bit - just my 8-1-8 warmup and a few paradiddles. Success at discipline by random chance. Cause I didn't wanna go back upstairs, fearing I might grow cold.

132,8 for 1 - Nice, the "clean single" of 85%.

Squats - bodyweight

5 - 10 - 15

Squats with jump-ups - i.e. explosive and accerated

5 - 5

5 - 5 thrusters with 6+6 kg dumbbells. It's kind of easier to control the acceleration when you have the extra weight, isn't?
Not perfect, but it's something.

Squeezed my dynamometer for 93-94 kgs right hand, 80 something left hand. I'm not sure, but I think it might be a PR? Perhaps my best was 96? Don't remember. Worth trying to get more! I think if I were to train it again I'd be able to squeeze for a hundred in a couple sessions. Just "get in shape", bring up the energy. I'll do a tiny bit of that today.

Squeezed it for 90 one more time and for 80 with the left. Decided to do a few singles with a Vulcan on lightest setting - should be nice for energy accumulation.

Final set today

Playing fun bluesy jams in E Mixolydian/A Major. Should film myself every time I'm doing it. Gonna be a tiny bit busy tomorrow. Morning and evening, as usual. I'm actually hyped to do some work. Thank God for that. Work is good. Saving money. Hope it ain't a waste.

Reading all those mad tirades has to psychologically tiring. I should probably just change my mentality for a while. Could be nice to feel calmer. Just calmer. But the spring is wound up, and it keeps getting  more wound.

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There's so much fun stuff to do. Some work tomorrow. Playing FO76 with the new update... I'll try to download it tonight. I will record tomorrow. Don't wanna write too much anymore.

But here's a funny moment I randomly got from playing AI Dungeon... The description the exercise made me laugh out loud multiple times as I imagined it in my head.

Random picture of the day - Landscape in south Kyrgyzstan. Simply beautiful, inspiring, freeing.